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New Muses Story!

Guys!

The amazingly talented Meredith posted her story “Lavender” today!! It is so poignant and beautiful and melancholic. It’s the sort of story that just demands a playlist – songs about fires and love, last moments and distant rumbles of thunder.

I can’t say enough good things about it. You have to read it. Now go – run – over to the Muses site, here, and read. You won’t be sorry. I promise.

 

blog life · How I Write · Muses · Writing · Writing Advice

How to Take Yourself Seriously and Why I Don’t “Just Write”

Since this is a writing blog (mostly) and I should be spending this time working on the Book (which is not book-shaped yet, but will be one-day. I hope…), I am of course going to write a blog post. This is going to be hefty. I’ve included mini-headings to break it up. I would include pictures of puppies, but I figured this blog was pretty long on its own.

30 Books and No Plan

I’ve been writing novels for 15 years. That sounds absurd when I write it like that, but it’s true. For the past 15 years, I have written or worked on a novel every single year. How? You might ask. Or, How many have you published? Or, if we’re really close and there’s wine involved, you might say, in a quiet, conspiratorial voice: Oh, so how many rejections have you gotten?

I can’t believe I am writing this but I am going to be honest and tell you that the answer is…none. I’ve neither published a book nor received a rejection for one, because truth be told, it wasn’t really until a few months ago that I decided I was going to take myself and this dream seriously. Yes, I’ve written books. I’ve written loads of books. And I can promise you, they were all terrible things. At least, they were, before I threw them all in the trash and said to myself “Becky, you are starting over from a clean slate. You will not be weighed down by failure. We are putting failure in the trash bin. You will learn to write a real book and you will like it.”

You may be thinking a few things at this point. Good god, this girl is insane and she talks to herself. She threw away thirty manuscripts? What made her take herself seriously finally? You might even be thinking, Omg, she put them in the trash and not the recycle bin?? (I did put them in the recycle bin. Well, the ones that could go in there. I’m not a monster.)

Here’s What Happened (A Love Story. No, really.)

Now, this story is going to sound a bit like a fairytale and a lot romantic. Because the truth is, the reason I finally started to take myself seriously is because I met a boy. Part of me wishes I could say that I’d finally realized that life is short and that I’d always wanted to be a writer and goddamnit I would be no matter what. I could lie even more and say that when I was laid off from my job in February, I spent an entire month rediscovering the joy and magic of writing and committed myself to getting published within a year. But those things are not true, and besides, the larger part of me doesn’t want to lie to you guys. (I did get laid off, but I spent a month discovering how much I liked expensive colored pencils and learning how to use them.)

Now, this wasn’t any boy. Turns out, this boy would become my boyfriend and then my fiance and, next year, my husband. K is a teacher and a musician and he has a work ethic and passion like no other. Just being around him inspires me constantly to be a better person. It’s true what they say about falling in love – it changes things about you and the way you see the world. Suddenly, I had this guy in my life and I’d gotten a new job with people I really liked, and things were going really well for me, and I was living a great life, and I realized, you know what’s missing? Writing.

I bet you’re thinking: Oh, so she fell in love and was so inspired and sat down at a computer and wrote an amazing book. HA. No. Well, uh, not really. There were other things involved. Things just as, if not more important.

But here’s the thing about K. He’s diligent. He generally knows exactly what he wants and what it looks like (or in his case, sounds like). And he goes out and he gets it. More than that, he takes himself and his craft seriously. He teaches music professionally. He gigs. He’s living his passion. You can’t be in love with someone like that and not want to be like that as well. So I decided to take myself seriously too, now that I knew what taking yourself seriously looked like. I decided that I was going to figure out precisely what I needed to do to write a good book. (Where good = Something I wouldn’t be embarrassed by.)

How I Used to Write

I’ve always wanted to be a writer. You don’t write thirty books just for fun. (Well, you might.) But I never took myself seriously enough. I never thought I could be good enough.

Here’s how I used to write:

  • Find a topic that seemed like it could hold my attention for 300 pages.
  • Brainstorm/plot what I thought should happen in this story (optional).
  • Sit down and type like a maniac. Not sure what line should come next? Doesn’t matter. Just. Keep. Typing.
  • Hit 40,000 words and panic that everything was terrible.
  • Hit delete and start over. Or sometimes charge on and promise myself I’d revise later (I never really did.)

There were a lot of problems with this method. Mostly, the fact that I was charging into a story with no sense of what a story was.

Yes, I said that. I wanted to be a writer and I didn’t know what a story was. Not really. Even though I’ve read hundreds of books. I could tell you what a story looked like and the vague, general things that should be in it (Interesting characters! An original plot! Obstacles! Beginning! Middle! End!), but I couldn’t tell you how to do those things. This meant that by the time I finished a book and re-read it, I had no idea what shape it was supposed to be, and therefore, had no idea how to fix it. And so, I’d push it aside, roll-up my sleeves, tell myself I just had to keep typing and that eventually, something would click, and I’d learn how to craft a story. Isn’t that the advice everyone gives as a writer? Just write?

Maybe for some people that works. But I bet those people also have an innate sense of what a story is. I didn’t.

Here’s How I Changed My Writing

So what did I do?

I threw away all of my old manuscripts because I needed to clear away the failure. Yes, this was terrifying. Yes, I did cry. No, I do not regret it.

I bought every book on craft ever. Okay, maybe not all of them. But I bought lots of them. And I read them and analyzed them and hated most of them. Except one: Lisa Cron’s latest book Story Genius: How to Use Brain Science to Go Beyond Outlining and Write a Riveting Novel (Before You Waste Three Years Writing 327 Pages That Go Nowhere).

I stumbled upon the incredible Joyce Chua’s post in Maggie Stiefvater’s Critique Partner match up (which I’ve written about before here), and she helped motivate me to push myself from “dreaming to be a writer” to “I’m going to be a writer” because she is so amazingly incredible and I knew I absolutely HAD to have her as a friend and critique partner.

When Joyce suggested joining forces with two other writers to form a writing group, I knew I’d found my tribe and the people that would help encourage me to really become a writer. Did I know how to write short stories? Of course not. Would I try? If it meant I could be friends with these three amazing women, absolutely.

I started to share my writing. I found a friend who isn’t a writer, but who is more than happy to bounce ideas around with me.

Most importantly, I decided, once and for all, that I was going to be a writer, and that I was going to be a writer in a way that worked for me.

The Lesson

Now, I’m not saying I turned into a serious writer overnight or that this book that I’m working on is going to get published and I’m going to be a NYT #1 Bestseller (though how cool would that be?) or even that finding love will change your life completely. But I am saying that if you want to be a writer, you need to figure out ways to take yourself seriously and you need to know what serious looks like for you. Sometimes, you’re just not ready, and that’s okay. But sometimes, things in your life will suddenly align and it’s like the universe is saying “NOW.”

Also, learn how you write. “Just write” can be really great advice for some people. But for me, it lead me to just write really terrible books, because I didn’t know what a story should look like. I’m probably not the best person to give advice, but I’m going to anyway. 

Here it is:

  1. Decide that you’re going to be a good writer and discover what that looks like.
  2. Read a dozen writing guides and try them all. Find the one that clicks.
  3. Pull your favorite books off your bookshelf and apply that writing guide to them. This is important because it will help you learn how your favorite books were crafted. Figure out why you love them, so you can figure out how you’ll love your book too.
  4. Find your tribe. (Maggie’s connection worked great for me, but you can also explore writer’s blogs and reach out to the author. Read through the comments on your favorite authors’ blogs. Be a stalker.)
  5. Most importantly, don’t give up.

 

How do you write?

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The Story Thieves

I absolutely love this story by the lovely and amazing Joyce. I am so so lucky to be able to call her my friend. This story is hauntingly beautiful and terrifyingly relevant. It’s also utterly atmospheric – the sentences, the descriptions, the characters. I loved this story and I hope you do too!

Muse in Pocket, Pen in Hand

Writing prompt

Every local on the island knew about the banned books. What they didn’t know was that they were stupidly easy to find. But that was only if you knew where to look, and if you knew what you were looking for.

Nobody knew what they were looking for anymore, though. Their vision had been whitewashed; their ears were now only peeled for the distant wail of sirens, their skins accustomed to the sting of rancour that pervaded the air.

The people’s anger was at times a living beast that walked among them, and at times an ash-filled cloud that smothered them wherever they went. They saw the same shades of black and white everywhere they went, and sometimes Annaliese wondered if they remembered a time when they could see colour, or a time when they remembered something called a story. Tales of the impossible, the imaginary and the imagined, that…

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blog life · Muses · Uncategorized · Writing

My first story is live!

I mentioned in my last post that our group blog “Muse in Pocket, Pen in Hand” was going live on Friday and Friday is now here! My story – the first short story I’ve written in ten years, and the only thing I’ve ever written with the immediate purpose of sharing it with the world – is up for anyone to read.

Here’s what I wrote about it:

The title came first for this story, which is surprising, because I’m usually rubbish at coming up with titles for just about anything. Well, really, the idea of burning love letters came first, and then the questions of who would be burning them, and why, and what if someone was receiving those burnt love letters, through some sort of weird magic? What if this person was like a patron saint, like Valentine, but for the opposite of love – for broken hearts? From there I had a title and a main character, and with a little bit more digging, a story line. Originally, the story was supposed to start with a picnic basket turning into a kitten, and while that’s still referenced in there, I think the resulting story more accurately represents the idea I wanted – a story about self-love and loss, fear and hope.

This group blog is honestly a dream come true. To be able to collaborate with some of the best writers I’ve ever met and with three of the nicest people in the world (we’re from the US, London, and Singapore), is just incredible. For the longest time, I used to hide that I was a writer. It wasn’t that I didn’t think it was cool, it was more that I never thought I’d be good enough, or that someone would read my stuff and tell me I wasn’t good enough. I’m pretty darn good at coming up with worst case scenarios for this sort of thing in my head, so you can imagine why I never talked about it.

But then, one day, I was scrolling through the responses to Maggie Stiefvater’s Critique Partner Love Connection, and Joyce’s post popped out at me. Really, it should have had blinking lights and a french horn and trumpets attached, because that’s how amazing it was. I emailed her immediately of course (how could I not?), and she emailed me back, and then, shortly after, she introduced me to Meredith and Nicole, and from there…what can I say? I’m the luckiest person ever to be in this group. Joyce inspires me daily with all of the novels she has written. Meredith got her doctorate in Scotland. Nicole works is a library and motivates me with her running tales. I don’t know where I’d be without these three amazing ladies. Please check out their bios over at the Muses blog. You won’t be sorry.

The gist of our blog is this: Each month, the four of us will write a short story based on a random prompt. We’ll then post our stories, one on every Friday of the month. I’ve never written to prompt before this and it’s turning out to be the most fun I’ve ever had writing. Nicole has posted a much more brilliant summary of what we do over on her blog, so I definitely recommend checking that out. (Plus, Nicole’s blog posts are just about the most delightful thing I’ve ever read, so you should read them all anyway. Actually everyone’s blogs are incredible. Go read them. Seriously.)

Now, before I go, I probably won’t do this for every story, but since this is the first one, I have to. I have to thank my friend Amy who read probably a dozen various versions of this story, and spent hours talking to me about the characters, and her excitement for it never flagged. Thank you, Amy, for loving this story as much as I do. Thank you to my wonderful fiance, who patiently listened to me obsess and cry over it, and graciously put up with me typing in bed when we should have been sleeping. And, I can’t forget Alice, my upstairs neighbor, who is the sweetest, nicest human in the universe, and had so much enthusiasm for this story even though she hadn’t read it yet. I’d be lost without my fellow muse-seekers, Meredith, who offered the most wonderful critique in the midst of her thesis corrections, and Joyce and Nicole, for believing in this story all along, and in me. Thank you.

And now onto the actual story. I hope you enjoy “Patron Saint of Broken Hearts” as much as I enjoyed writing it. (Or at least, that you don’t hate it… or hate me because you hate it…)

blog life · Writing

Liebster Award

For years and years, I have wanted to keep a blog. I have at least half a dozen in various stages of disrepair and abandonment floating around in the dark, dusty spaces of the internet. But since meeting the most wonderful people in the world – Nicole Evans, Joyce Chua, and Meredith Crosbie – and starting our own writing blog (which goes live on Friday!), my motivation has come galloping back. Mostly it’s saying “Don’t be the only one who doesn’t blog, Becky” and I’ve got to say, I’m fairly decent at peer-pressuring myself. I can’t promise that I’ll have a new post every week, but I will try to post at least once or twice a month. Or, you know, link to someone else’s blog.

To start off this blog, I thought I’d actually complete the Liebster Award, which Joyce nominated me for, like, two months ago. (Sorry Joyce!) I figured it will give you a fair sense of who I am. You’re supposed to nominate people after you’ve finished the Liebster Award, but since all the writers I know have already completed it…um.

Anyway, here we go!

Write about a favourite blog that is not yours.

I adore Laini Taylor’s blog mostly because I love Laini and I’m obsessed with everything she’s ever written. I also can’t stop refreshing Victoria Schwab’s twitter feed, which I know isn’t the same as a blog, but it’s got writing tips, so I’m hoping it counts?

Share 11 facts about yourself.

Here goes, in no particular order:

  1. I’m barely 5 feet tall. I like to round up, even though I hate heels.
  2. I wrote my first book when I was 13. It was a handwritten mess of pages, started on a cranky Thanksgiving evening, and was basically a superman re-telling with a female lead.
  3. I have nine siblings.
  4. I love art and I’ve fallen in love with colored-pencils, even though it often takes about 100 hours to finish one piece.
  5. I can’t ever sit still, so if I’m watching TV, I’m also simultaneously jogging on my treadmill, knitting, or painting.
  6. I sit on a yoga ball when I’m working. This helps with #5.
  7. I once flew a helicopter. It was the best thing ever and if I was five inches taller (and had more money), I’d totally get my helicopter flying license for all those times when a helicopter magically appears in a field and you need to save the day and fly everyone to safety.
  8. I get to marry my best friend next year and every single day I can’t believe how lucky I am to have met him.
  9. I once let my sister dye my hair purple. It was supposed to last two weeks and fade by the time I went back to work. It lasted 2.5 years. It probably would have lasted longer, but I cut it off.
  10. I lived in England for a year and studied in the same library where they filmed Harry Potter.
  11. I can’t live more than a 10 minute drive from the ocean or I go crazy. There’s something about it that gets into your blood.

QUESTIONS FOR NOMINEES

1. What is your strangest writing habit/routine?

I used to write on a bus. I commuted each day to work on a coach bus, two hours in, two hours out, if there was no traffic. But I could only write if there was no one sitting next to me, and I wrote better when it was still pitch dark outside, so there was nothing to distract me from the words I was supposed to be putting down on the screen. I also had a specific seat I liked to sit in. I was very particular – everything had to be just so. I think back to it now, those five a.m. rides, and how annoying my constant typing must have been to all the other commuters on the bus trying to sleep. Now, with the craziness of life, I’ve learned to write whenever I get a chance – sometimes at the breakfast table, sometimes in bed before I go to sleep, sometimes at the edge of a dock, sometimes squeezed into the passenger seat of a car surrounded by sailing equipment. Rarely do I actually get to sit down at a desk for any prolonged amount of time and just write. I’ve learned to lose myself in the story instantaneously. It’s more productive that way.

2. What is your biggest regret in life?

I lived in England for a year for school, and I was so homesick, so depressed, that I was barely able to make the trip between the library and my bedroom. I wish I’d been able to pull myself out of it and explore the city, make friends, go on day trips. More than anything, I wish I’d made the trip to Scotland – only a train ride away. If I have one regret, that’s it – that I didn’t take advantage of the time I had when I was there to explore and learn.

3. What kind of music do you listen to, especially when you’re writing?

I listen to all sorts of music – country, pop, rock, some rap, classical. I’m really not picky. I love music most in the car, when I’m on my own and I can listen to it as loud as I want to. Generally, I tend to listen to the same artists over and over again, though I once tried to listen to 100 different artists in one month. My fiance is a musician, so I’ve gotten a much bigger music education lately – lots of classical, orchestras, symphonies, operas. But when I’m writing? I can’t listen to anything. It’s very strange. I used to listen to lots of music when I wrote. I had loads of elaborate playlists, set by scene and pacing. Now I need silence.

4. What is one skill you have always wanted to learn?

I would love to learn an instrument. I have a guitar. It’s tiny because I’m tiny. When I first got it, I practiced everyday for thirty minutes. It came with me everywhere. I was convinced I’d be the next Taylor Swift or something. I haven’t played in over a year, but I’m hoping to start up again.

5. Who’s your biggest writing inspiration?

Maggie Stiefvater is by far my biggest writing inspiration, though I could probably say the same of Laini Taylor or Victoria Schwab. I admire their perseverance and I adore their stories.

6. What was your favorite book or series as a child?

I was obsessed with the Heartland Series by Lauren Brooke (though, I just googled them and learned they were all ghost-written by Linda Chapman?!). I’d get a new one and then disappear into my bedroom and refused to emerge until I finished the book. I think what I fell in love with in these books wasn’t necessarily the horses, but the idea that someone could be so amazingly good at one thing, in this case, taking care of the horses. And, of course, I adored Harry Potter. I read the first one so many times I had the first eight pages memorized. Also, I cannot forget Sarah Dessen. Her books got me through high school.

7. If you could live anywhere in the world, where would you live?

I love the place I grew up – the lovely Cape Cod. I’m super lucky because my fiance has a house there. It’s the only place that’s ever felt like home to me. There’s this wonderful sigh of relief every time I cross the bridge to it. I remember my mom once told me that the ocean gets into your blood, and it’s true. I can’t stay inland for very long without getting anxious.

8. If you were stranded on a desert island with three books/series, what would they be? (“How to Build a Raft” and the like don’t count!)

Hmmm….does the Harry Potter series count? There’s enough of them to keep me busy for awhile!

9. What is your biggest fear?

My biggest fear is driving. Also dying in a car crash while driving. I still drive – I have to, especially since it’s my favorite place to listen to music – but it makes me anxious to get behind the wheel every time. The craziest thing is that I love cars. I’d love a Tesla more than anything. But driving it? That’s a totally different story. I read a blog post once by someone who said that the reason they didn’t like driving was because they could imagine all of the other drivers’ expectations of what they should or shouldn’t do, and I think that’s definitely a big part of it. I’m a generally anxious person, and one of the things that fuels that is my attempt to figure out and meet other people’s expectations, and I can’t do that when I’m driving.

10. What is one author quote that you identify with the most? (It can be about writing per se or life in general.)

Victoria Schwab tattooed the words “Rise Up” on her wrist after the American election. The words really resonate, not just because of the election, but because they encourage me to actually rise up to the challenge of writing the best story I can write. So many times, I get bogged down in self-doubt and give up on stories. But the idea of “rising up” makes me want to rise above those doubts and learn to become the best version of myself so that I can write those stories as truthfully and honestly as possible.

11. What made you decide to be a writer and where do you see yourself in five years?

I started writing when I was 13, as a way to create the sort of world I wanted to be living in – a world of magic and space travel and stars. I was also a lonely, self-doubting child around that time, so I gave that first character the sort of perfect, best friend/boyfriend that I wish I could have had. It was an escape of sorts. A way to live the life I wanted when I couldn’t live it in reality. It gave me a place to go when school was hard, when I felt bullied, when the pressures of studying got to be too much. But the act of writing stuck, and I’ve written something every year since. In five years, I’d love to have a book published (don’t we all??). I have no idea if this will actually happen, but I’m working towards it. I’ve reached a point where I’m willing to work hard to get there, and I have an amazing group of writing friends now that motivate me to improve and reach for these dreams. 🙂

Hope you enjoyed reading and that I didn’t scare you away!